Wednesday, December 28, 2011

The Thinking Man, Paralysis by Analysis

Now, for a satirical excerpt from "The Thinking Man, Paralysis by Analysis" by Nadina Boun.

No party or ceremony is ever complete without a drink or two. Hence, follow the rules of the drink as established by the king of the castle, The Thinking Man. Here is an excerpt for your your enjoyment:

"Rules of the drink host:

Should His Highness ever invite thee over for a drink, acceptance is mandatory.

Always bring His Highness a nice bottle of scotch regardless of what thou drinkst.

Plenty of refreshments will be provided by thee, please make sure His Highness’ glass is always full.

An invitation is by no means a contract to a shag. A Shag requested by His Highness on the other hand is mandatory.

Please treat the castle in regards to cleanliness only, as though it were yours.

Upon the last tune, make sure thou do not findst thyself lounging on couches.

Whence His Highness is no longer in sight, please find thy way to the exit door, promptly.

Do not attempt to make a toast unless thou art boasting about His Highness.

If by chance thy hands are full and a toast is proposed by His Highness, thy glass must be raised using one or another of thy limbs.

Vacate the lavatory immediately regardless of thy position, should His Highness attempt to open the door.

No fornication is to be allowed on the premises unless it includes His Highness.

Lastly, thou shall never lay thy hands on His Highness’ last bottle of scotch, else thy punishment is death in exile.

Thank you for accepting the terms and conditions of the drink invitation.”

May your glass be full, always, and thank you James and Miss Havana!



  1. Oh, if this were but enforceable in my own castle... LOL

    Edward Owen
    edward (at) storiesbyedwardowen (dot) com

  2. LOL Edward.... Hi James & Miss Havana... dropping by again and cheers for that excerpt! I made sure to enforce it on Christmas guests and surely upon New Year's eve, the rules shall prevail :)

  3. Love it! I guess it's good to be the King :-)

  4. Love your cover for Infinity Quest. So cool. P.R. Mason
    pmas0518 (at) bellsouth (dot) com

  5. I have my eye on the Empress of Tridon. Believe it or not, I see myself in that role :)